Public deaths, on the other hand, serve a social purpose. For instance, public executions are meant to be cathartic events in which society extracts its pound of flesh, as it were. It supposedly serves as a deterrent to criminal or aberrant behavior and reflects the manner by which justice is served within a community. It’s also morbidly entertaining and can even be interactive, such as in the practice of stoning or the spectators’ participation in the gory events in the Roman Colosseum.

Other public deaths, such as the assassination of Ninoy Aquino, serve as a catalyst for social upheaval and change.

Suicide is a more complicated phenomenon in which no easy generalizations can be made. It can be done privately or in plain of view others, but even the most secretive act of taking one’s life assumes a public aspect upon the discovery of the body. The act itself is shocking under any circumstance, being so contrary to what we normally know and expect of human behavior. Thus, the ripple effects of a suicide extend beyond the immediate family or social circle of the victim to the society at large. I knowingly use the word “victim” as I believe those who kill themselves are casualties of one or another of life’s events which makes continued living unbearable. However, some suicides are more publicly significant that others.

The suicide of Mohamed Boazizi, a young Tunisian who immolated himself in protest over the oppressive and autocratic rule of strongman Zine el Abidine Ben Ali and led to his ouster, is a public death. It started a conflagration which has spread to Egypt and threatens to engulf the entire region. In 60 years, there has never been one case of a successful, popular revolt toppling an Arab regime; now, within a span of 2 months, two governments in the Middle East have fallen.

The suicide of Anglo Reyes is a public death, as he led a public life which, for good or ill, “shaped and reflected the events of his time“. As explained by Prof. Randy David:

Although he was a professional military man, Angelo T. Reyes became a key player in the nation’s political stage. Whether he welcomed it or not, he unexpectedly found himself, as head of the Armed Forces, thrust into the role of political arbiter during the crisis of January 2001. At that crucial moment, the military became, once again, the deciding factor in an unstable political equation. Reyes made the decision to lead his soldiers in withdrawing support from President Joseph Estrada, paving the way for the accession to the presidency of Vice President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo.

Having cast his lot with GMA, Mr. Reyes prospered for a long while, even after he retired from military service. He assumed numerous cabinet posts, in fact too many, according to his detractors. This may have been his undoing as he should have sought elective position earlier, and retained some degree of political power and influence, before he was permanently tarred by the corrupt brush of the shamelessly venal Arroyo administration.

Stripped of political influence, he knew that he was vulnerable. He had a thorough understanding of how the political system works—its hypocrisy, its rottenness, and its rituals of degradation. But he could not summon enough will to bow to its sometimes brutal ways once he found himself at the receiving end of power.

And so he ended his life. And this is not always the easy way out, as many would like to believe. It takes a certain amount to steel in one’s personality to pull the trigger.

On a certain level, his motivation was certainly self-serving. He was, by his own estimation, extremely self-assured, even arrogant in the eyes of others. He wanted to regain some control over events which now threatened to destroy him, his family and what he saw as his historical legacy, most specially as a professional soldier. His suicide was premeditated and not an impulsive act, which are how most suicides are seen by those who study the phenomenon. Angelo Reyes knew what he was doing. He said so himself. In his “last” interview he stated pointedly:

Living life without honor is a tragedy bigger than death itself.

He could have stonewalled and gone the legal route in deflecting the accusations against him. Others have done so and lived to tell the tale (as well as enjoy their ill-gotten wealth). But this was not the soldier’s way. As a warrior, honor impelled him to fall on his sword. In doing so, he was successful to some extent in saving his good name and dignity. This is an example which others similarly situated should consider following, for their own sake and, more importantly, for the good of the country.

The tragedy of Angelo Reyes is that, despite his avowed intention to “come clean”, in the end he did not. He lacked the courage to name names and help cleanse the institutions which he served so loyally and bravely. And he tried to minimize his role by saying, truthfully enough, that: “I did not invent corruption. I walked into it“. But he lacked the will to walk out of it, until the only way he could leave was horizontally and feet first.

Be that as it may, the man is dead, and we condole with his family and friends as “Taps” is played today for a fallen warrior.

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Mark and Matthew attribute this to the dying Christ. It has been interpreted through the centuries as a cry of utter despair and fading hope.

Luke, perhaps finding such words repugnant as it suggests a slide into black doubt, says that Christ’s words were actually: “Father, into your hands I commend my spirit” Modern believers are more comfortable with Luke’s version, as His dying words are more in keeping with common doctrinal teachings that God will look after us and never leave us.

For all we know, He may have uttered both, they are not incompatible.

But I personally find the Mark and Matthew portrayal more realistic, more believable. We can easily relate to it. Who has not, at some dark hour, cried out to the heavens in anguish and pain and wondered if indeed we have been cursed and abandoned by God ? Jesus was a man, after all, and revealed his humanity many times, in many ways. Why not in death ?

Philip Yancey points out that it is this single time, of all His prayers in the Gospels, that Jesus used the formal, distant “God” rather than “Abba” or “Father”. He was quoting from a psalm (Psalm XXII,18), of course, but he was also expressing a deep sense of estrangement. The Son abandoned by the Father. No theologian can adequately explain the nature of what took place within the Trinity on that day in Calvary.

I find this the most poignant example of Christ’s humanity. It brings me closer to Him as we are all, at many difficult times in our lives, children who feel abandoned by the Father. But somehow we are given the strength and grace to surrender and say: “Thy will be done”

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Don’t get me wrong. I do appreciate what an amazing platform for connectivity Facebook and its ilk are. People I haven’t seen or heard from in decades are now my Facebook buddies. And I know why it’s such a hit for us Pinoys. It’s rooted deep in our national psyche, the need to be part of a community and to interact constantly.

But a good friend has observed that I can be antisocial. He may be right to some extent. I can be misanthropic. Or I may just be a very reserved person. Shy even.

I don’t chat online. There are times when I don’t even answer my email unless they’re work-related. I neglect my blog and don’t respond to comments, which I’m told a good blogger should always do. I log out of the internet for weeks at a time. Which, at this time and age, makes me a rather odd duck.

My problem is the whole idea that we seem to be expected to now establish “relationships” with everyone we come across. Not in the romantic sense but in the marketing sense. We have to sell our online and offline personas and to do this we have to practice “relationship marketing” . But like Butch, my friends are the ones I enjoy libations with, argue passionately about everything and nothing and who I may not be in touch with for months (even years) at a time but who won’t mind and will embrace me just as warmly the next time we meet. Because “ things get too busy or life yanks us in unexpected directions”. And these relationships are built over time. It’s a process that can’t be rushed, like the aging of fine wine.

Or maybe I’m only trying to justify my crabbiness. In any case, I’m not about metamorphose from a worm to a social butterfly anytime soon.

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The global economic downturn doesn’t seem like such a bad thing after all, if you’re an associate at Skadden, Arps, Slate Meagher and Flom, the largest U.S. law firm in terms of revenue. Due to the recession, which would predictably cut into its projected revenues, Skadden has offered its 1,300 associates worldwide 80,000 U.S. dollars each to take the year off. They’re encouraged to find pro-bono work and render meaningful service to any cause of their choice although “the lawyers could also spend the year catching up on every episode of “Top Chef” that they missed during the boom years, or traveling around the world“.

To sweeten the deal further, any associate on sabbatical will be spared from downsizing and will have their jobs waiting when they return. If every associate would take the partners up on their offer, it would cost the firm U.S.$ 104,000,000, not exactly chump change but still a mere 2% of its annual earnings. It seems lawyering, at least at the level of Skadden, is recession-proof. The Skadden Insider, a blog purporting to be run by two of the firm’s associates, crowed a few months back that “the firm’s business is strong and that billable hours are essentially the same compared to the same period last year”.

But since, according to its Wiki page, Skadden “has played a significant role in U.S. and international business”, one wonders how much it has contributed to the present financial debacle. Given the scope of the firm’s practice, it’s inconceivable that it was not involved in a major way in the U.S. mortgage bonds meltdown that resulted in the global financial crisis. But being good lawyers, the members of the firm would surely have insulated themselves from the fallout.
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I stumbled across a series of posts in Slate by Meghan O’Rourke, The Long Goodbye, on how she has been coping with the death of her mother. It’s one of the most honest, poignant and evocative pieces I’ve read recently on the grieving process. I think her being a poet gives her prose so much more depth and meaning in dealing with this most difficult of subjects.

I have been feeling raw this past few days and could not put my finger on any single specific reason. O’Rouke gave me some much needed perspective for which I am grateful.
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A report in the Philippine Star says that looks certainly was a factor. Mr. Fortun gallantly admitted that Mr. Tamano is indeed better looking than him. Adel jokingly said: “Off the record, it is because I am good looking.” Which promptly went on the record.

In any event, Dr. Belo will have the best of both worlds, as Mr. Fortun will stay on as counsel in a pending cases and will be available at any time to handle special projects or whenever she needs a legal pit bull. Not that legal expertise and experience would be lacking on the part of Mr. Tamano. He also has as law office partner former Supreme Court Justice Santiago Kapunan. Adel will likewise be the mouthpiece and public face of the Belo Group, which will give it some degree of class and credibility beyond its current tacky image.

This arrangement dovetails nicely with Adel’s plans to run for the senate in 2010, as Belo’s hefty advertising budget and broadcast media connections will guarantee that he will constantly be in the public eye. A good deal all around.
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I have no fear of death or its images, of wakes and funerals and scenes of violence and mayhem. At least this is what I tell myself. If anything, I have gone through a phrase of inordinate fascination with death, looking into the face of it in an attempt to unlock its unfathomable mystery.

Except when the death involves a child and then I am overwhelmed by feelings of anxiety and anguish. And anger. Old wounds I have struggled to heal from are reopened and I find myself flailing helplessly against a tide of sorrow.

A young boy was killed the week just past, and seeing his father trying to find words to express his family’s inexpressible grief broke my heart. He did a much better job than I could ever have done. When I was in his unenviable position years ago, I was struck dumb. It was my wife who stood up and spoke for us.

Looking at his stricken face during the last rites for the boy, I of course saw myself. The messages he wanted to impart were the very same ones I would have wanted to say, had my voice and heart not failed me.

First, of course, was forgiveness from his child for not having been there when he most needed him. It was not the father’s fault. How could anyone have expected that in a school, a supposedly safe sanctuary if ever there was one, lurked death’s grim countenance ? That he said it in Ilocano, the dialect of my childhood, struck an even deeper chord.

He had to articulate it out of love, although no child, wherever he may be, would withhold forgiveness. Like I said, it was not his fault that he was not there.

The next message was to himself. He had been hearing a lot of what people took to be words of consolation, the gist of which is that God works in mysterious ways. By this, implying that acceptance should follow. Well, of course God is mysterious. It’s in his/her nature to be beyond human comprehension. But that doesn’t mean that we are precluded from asking the question “Why?”.

The father (and all those who mourn with him) needs to ask questions if he is too deal honestly with his grief. Like Job, he can praise the Lord’s name while at the same time questioning the iniquity of the tragedy that befell him. Like Job, he can well ask “Why should not my spirit be troubled? ” (Job 21:4). He may not get the answers he wants or expects but the process of grieving demands that he asks certain hard questions: of himself, of others and even of God.

To his family he expressed his gratitude and love in this most painful of times. They need to be there for each other. The support of family is indispensable if one is to gain the strength and courage to grieve. Family is the bedrock and foundation upon which one needs to rebuild a shattered life.

To the community he gave heartfelt thanks and the promise that he will do everything in his power to ensure that nothing like this happens again to anyone.

In closing he said the exact same words that I said to my family the afternoon my son died: “He will always be with us”.

From my experience, the grief journey itself is oftentimes lonely and solitary. One goes through it alone. But fellow travelers will offer succor and comfort during times when the burden seems unbearable.

Gregory Floyd, writing on the death of his son who was struck by a car in front of their house in a quiet cul-de-sac, offers some words of solace and advice on how he and his wife coped with the loss:

A few things we could do: speak the truth in love, show one another affection, and give one another the space to grieve. We could say to one another: We will see him again. This did nothing to ease the emotional pain, but it did enable us to fix God’s truth in our minds. The pain wracked us, convulsed us, made us wonder whether we were capable of any more. Yet, just when we felt we could not stand another minute, God breathed his word into our souls: “God is faithful and will not let you be tried beyond your strength; but with the trial he will provide a way out, so that you may be able to bear it” (1 Corinthians 10:13)

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And what could be a more joyful occasion than that of the birth of a baby ? That’s what the whole Christmas thing is supposed to be all about, at least on a superficial level.

And Manny Pacquiao is a blessed man in this regard. Wife Jinky gave birth to a 7.9-pound baby girl at the Los Angeles Metropolitan Hospital just as the year was ending, with him present and even cutting his baby girl’s umbilical cord. Her name is Queen Elizabeth and is the Pacquiao couple’s fourth child.

Manny is no Anglophile, as far as I know, but the name is somehow apt. There’s no parent that wouldn’t want their daughter to be an empress, even if only in name, and her arrival can be said to be the crowing event of a felicitous year for Pacquiao. And the upbeat symbolism of a baby at the start of a new year can hardly be missed. She will be seen as a harbinger of better things to come. Our best new year’s wishes to the new queen of the Pacquiao household.

Another story I saw at CNN concerns a cat in a hat who is said to be worth US$ 10 million. As a latecomer to the cat-appreciation tribe (I had to be kicked dragging and screaming into the feline world by my wife and kids), I still find cat stories enthralling.

Tama is a 9-year-old calico cat, who used to live a simple life hanging out at the train station next to her home at the grocery store.

But with the addition of a hat, usually worn at a jaunty angle, she’s become a local, national and even international star.

Tama’s home of Kishikawa in Japan is an isolated town of just a few thousand people, the last stop on what had been a failing train line.

That all changed when the Wakayama Electric Railway decided to use Tama as a mascot.

They called her a “Super Stationmaster,” made a promotional poster for train carriages and gave her that stationmaster’s hat.

Now tourists flock here to see the cat and to snap a picture.

“It’s a chance to take a break from the problems facing Japan,” said Haruto Maeda, who took the day off work to see Tama.

As well as their cameras, visitors are bringing their cash. A study at Osaka University found that Tama fever was responsible for pumping $10 million into the local economy.

Tama merchandise abounds, empty train carriages are now full and the line is no longer facing bankruptcy. The town of Kishikawa is enjoying an economic turnaround amid the national and global slowdown.

Tama now lives full-time at the station, with her mom and a friend.

She’s the prize of the town’s locals who say that in these tough economic times they’ll take a gift horse — or cat — wherever they can get it.

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However…

Gloria is still around.

The peso continues to depreciate against the dollar, in spite of the spike in OFW remittances during the Christmas season, although the exchange rate breached the P50.00-US$1 line only for a short while, and immediately recovered.

The price of food and other basic commodities continue to increase, despite the drop in energy costs, a major input in production and transport. Oil has fallen to new price lows, but not before the oil companies, particularly the big three, Shell, Caltex and Petron, made a killing (and continue to do so). They are quick to raise prices but take their sweet time adjusting it downward when the market corrects. This mentality of greed affects all other sectors (like food producers and retailers) as well. Hopefully, prices will stabilize after the mad consumption of the holidays.

The crime rate continues to rise. As does the brutality level of the atrocities committed against persons and property, not only by criminals but by those expected to uphold the law and protect the populace. No need to expound on this, as anyone who reads the papers or listens to the news, even intermittently, knows it.

The only prediction I feel happy calling correctly is that Manny Pacquio would kick another opponent’s butt before the end of the year. And I thought it would be Edwin Valero or Ricky Hatton, but it turned out to be Oscar De La Hoya. Doubly pleased, as he bagged a biggie in the Golden Boy.

And now here is my fearless (not really, as some are obvious given the current environment) forecast for the first half of 2009:

1. The global financial crisis will hit hard in the first two quarters of 2009 – Everybody says so. The E.U. and the U.S. are in recession and China, India and Japan will hit the doldrums soon, if they haven’t already, leaving the rest of us in the economic dumps. Finance Secretary Margarito Teves explained “There’s a time lag in terms of the impact of a global economic slowdown. The time lag will affect Asia by next year more than this year“. Per Teves, when the crunch hits home, the effects could come in the form of a slowdown in business activity and slower export growth. Not to mention loss of jobs, inflation and other attendant ills of a contracting economy.

2. The crime rate will go up even further – Due to number one above.

3. OFW remittances will slow down – Like I said before, the host economies of Filipinos abroad are also facing hard times and employment opportunities will be affected. Lay-offs will be inevitable. But technically-proficient OFWs will continue to be in demand. It’s the non-skilled workers who will feel the brunt of the slowdown in hiring.

4. The peso will continue to depreciate against the dollar - The peso, which has fallen 13 percent against the dollar this year, will decline further in 2009 due to the impact a worsening global economic downturn will have on foreign investments, exports and overseas remittances. A no-brainer, as an anemic economy will naturally result in a weak peso. Not entirely a bad thing, as our exports will become more attractive to outside buyers. Also, the monetary value of OFW remittances will appreciate.

5. Scientology will debut in the Philippines.

6. The Philippine blogosphere will continue to be play a prominent role in unfolding events -No one can deny the growing popularity and influence of blogs as a source of information and opinion. The Philippine blogging community will continue to expand and will leave a larger (and hopefully positive) imprint in our political, social and professional lives. Why so ? Simply because no blogger is an island, and as a community, its natural impetus is to grow. And flex its muscles.

7. Pacquiao will kick Ricky Hatton’s ass and will then launch his own fight promotions company – The Pacquiao-Hatton fight promises to be another classic, this time between two evenly matched brawlers. Pacquiao will prevail and can seriously start considering retirement after another 1 to 2 farewell bouts. But not before setting up his own promotions enterprise. Manny’s no fool and has seen that the long-term money is in matchmaking. Why not take another page out Oscar De La Hoya’s playbook ? Why do you think he went to all the trouble and expense of bringing Mexican boxers David Diaz and Edwin Valero to Gen San for his birthday bash ? He needs marquee fighters on his side and is laying the foundation of an even bigger empire if he succeeds. Bob Arum must be worried to death that his main man is about to go his own way.

May we all have a serene and joyous New Year’s Eve and a bountiful 2009.

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Death takes no holidays. We all know this but it would be too painful to acknowledge it during this season of supposed joy. Sometimes we are reminded of this undeniable truth on a grand scope, as happened during the Asian tsunami of 2004, which claimed an estimated 230,000 lives, and displaced millions. Its 4th anniversary was recollected on December 26 in homes and beaches from Indonesia to India. It is believed to be the deadliest tsunami in recorded history.

More often death arrives on a more modest scale, although the tragedy is not in any way diminished by the numbers involved. Whether it be 1 or 100,000, the pain and anguish can be overwhelming for those forced to confront it. This is even more heart-rending in the case of children dying.

In yesterday’s Inquirer, Randy David wrote in his column about the death of a little boy from a cause which could have been prevented, if only circumstances, or the fates, or God, had been kinder:

While the rest of the world marked the joyous day of the Nativity in homes filled with the laughter of children, they passed the day at the dimly-lit mortuary of the church in Lubao town in the province of Pampanga, quietly keeping vigil over the lifeless body of their youngest child, Gian Carlo, who died from the rabies virus on the night of Dec. 23. He was five years old.

This is not where children are supposed to be on Christmas Day. At age five, having weathered the usual illnesses of infancy, little boys are supposed to be indestructible. A child lying inside a coffin is an incongruous image for Christmas. The child’s father, Rex, could hardly contain the enormity of his pain. “Gian Carlo was my tail,” he said. “I walked him to kindergarten school every morning and waited for him after school. He would then accompany me to work. He made each day complete.”

Sometime in mid-December, mother and child were in a shopping mall looking for gifts. The little boy complained of having a headache. They went home, suspecting nothing worse than the onset of a mild flu. Then the intense itchiness came, radiating from the superficial dog scratch on Gian Carlo’s back, which had long healed, to his nape and head. The boy’s head began to swirl and throb as large beads of sweat formed on his handsome face.

They rushed him to the nearest hospital, but the doctors could not recognize the early symptoms of rabies infection. The scratch from the neighbor’s rabid pet occurred in early October. The dog mysteriously vanished soon later. The wound quickly healed after a few days. Assured that it was not a bite but just a scratch, the boy’s parents did not immediately make the connection. Most Filipinos would not have suspected any link precisely because of inadequate public knowledge of the sources, symptoms and incidence of rabies in the country. People continue to die from rabies because it is easy to confuse its early flu-like symptoms with ordinary ailments. The subsequent appearance of its distinct symptoms—delirium, hyperactivity, furious agitation, hydrophobia, foaming around the mouth, and gradual paralysis—always signals the advanced stage of the infection.

Nothing is more unimaginable as suffering, says the inconsolable Rex, than for a parent to watch a child slowly succumb to death from rabies. The victim struggles against the onset of respiratory arrest. Panic shows in his eyes. And you can do nothing. I believe him. Each time I watch my 8-year-old granddaughter Julia gasp for a little air when she’s having a simple asthmatic attack, I suspend my own breathing. Little children are not supposed to die.

But they do die, at Christmas and other times. In a recent memorial service we attended for bereaved parents, whose children passed away at various ages and from many different causes, someone pointed out that even the first Christmas was attended by many such tragic deaths.

Herod “the Great” was the ruler in Judea at the time of Christ’s birth. He was an unpopular king, being a Roman lackey, and he feared any threat to his power. He killed his wife, his brother and his sister’s two husbands, to name only a few who he perceived as plotting against him. And he took the news of this newborn king literally. When the wise men from the east, whom he had asked to report the whereabouts of the Christ Child, did not report back to Herod as they were warned by an angel to take another route, the murderous king decided to take drastic measures .

“Herod, when he saw that he had been tricked by the wise men, was in a furious rage, and he sent and killed all the male children in Bethlehem and in all that region who were two years old or under, according to the time of which he had ascertained from the wise men” (Matthew 2:16). Little did Herod know that the new king and his parents had already escaped.

Thus, the fulfillment of Jeremiah’s prophecy of the Old Testament in the New Testament: “A voice was heard in Ramah, wailing and loud lamentation, Rachel weeping for her children; she refused to be consoled, because they were no more” (Jeremiah 31:15).

Which is why the Catholic Church celebrates today as the Feast of the Holy Innocents.

Thus, it has always been. Even as we celebrate the birth of our Savior, we mourn the loss of those who were called home before their time.

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